I've just gone from a nice cushty job where I could work from home and knew it inside out so basically could skive off and pottle round the house without speaking to another soul all day for the past four years to an office-based 9-5 in a busy department where the average age is 20+ years younger than me. A week in and I am loving it but am having to be the leopard big time when it comes to systems, tech, templates, forms etc. I've very quickly realised that coasting at home institutionalised me to such an extent that I now have massive social anxiety, imposter syndrome and paranoia that I am going to break everything. I am convinced that I am fucking up all the time and that everyone thinks I am a twat when actually nothing could be further from the truth - I know what I am doing, they are glad that I am there and are pleased with what I'm going to bring. I've also realised that people are friendly, nice, kind, want to chat and are good to be around. And that young people are amazing, my kids really are going to be OK in five years time. It's taken sleepless nights and lots of self-talk to get me through the door even here but I can see a change in the way I carry myself after 4 days.
Thanks Esther, needed this today. Like others here my work life feels wobbly. I've just left a huge organisation (well known and trusted but actually a serious shitshow of chaos underneath the cuddly exterior) where I had lots of holiday and flexibility but NO job satisfaction and no particular prospects, to join a very small organisation where the expectations are huge, far less holiday and flexibility (I'll need to work bank hols or take them out of my allowance for example) but the long term prospects could be enormous and the job satisfaction more immediate and palpable too. Thank for reminding me to pull on my big girl/leopard pants and take each day separately while I get used to things.
For the first time ever I’ve just taken a job with the same BH contract arrangements. Despite all the other benefits, it’s all I can think about currently 😂 Good luck.
Good luck to you too, it’s taking over my thoughts as well, with every Times article, blog or email I get about “taking advantage of the bank holiday weekend!” I revert to grumpy teenager, or grumpy perimeno bag. Will be thinking of you on Monday ☺️
Good for you!! I am one of life’s coasters, a grazing goat, and now use my children as an excuse for it. I’ve coasted my way into a lovely position to be fair. But it won’t move myself, my family or society (ha!! In commercial property - sure) on. The world frankly needs more people like you than me, and I am always in awe of the bravery, energy and tenacity it requires.
I have historically been a people pleaser, hating confrontation and going round in circles of resentment, putting myself out until I am exhausted just to meet other peoples’ needs.
I now have a new fantastic therapist, who is not a leopard but a lioness. She is teaching me new ways to create boundaries. I’m saying no and repeating myself until the message sinks in to the Level 10 cheeky f*ckers so they can no longer take advantage of my kindness. Go me!
I am I new job, managing for the first time, in a very difficult operating environment. I am repeating the serenity prayer to my team at weekly team meetings (and also to myself when they piss me off… regularly)
The yips are the worst! Sam is probably too young but do you remember a novel called The Art of Fielding from about a decade ago? It’s a great novel in general but also terrific on the yips
My son eats barely anything. He says he doesn’t trust food. I get it and have decided to go with it and not stress too much.
Last month he said he remembered having a tuna sandwich or maybe a wrap that he had enjoyed. Since then he and I have tried together to re-create the sandwich or wrap, that he will enjoy. I think we are on our 11th attempt. Not too much mayo, plenty of mayo, black pepper, brown wrap, white sliced bread etc etc GOD we have tried.
That kid has tried each and everyone, and every bit of his face has wanted to enjoy it, but then it’s not right. Last night I had a brain wave and said was it at X’s party that you had it? yes he said!
Just messaged the mum and now ordering a Morrisons party platter of kids sandwiches. This could be the time my leopard finally gets out 😃
I do know this is ridiculous but I only have one child and that’s my excuse for everything.
Hope you get over that fence! My son is neurodiverse and eats a v restricted diet, but step by step, as he has gotten a bit older and his appetite has increased, he has got a little bit more adventurous with food! I always try not to look “too leopard” as I hang around him hoping against hope that he’ll eat something new! Good luck. Xxx
Thanks for this. I’m feeling a bit wobbly about work at the minute; usually a job I love but new boss is making life uncomfortable for everyone. I’m going to try to be more leopard. Xx
I will remember this leopard story. Thank you.
I've just gone from a nice cushty job where I could work from home and knew it inside out so basically could skive off and pottle round the house without speaking to another soul all day for the past four years to an office-based 9-5 in a busy department where the average age is 20+ years younger than me. A week in and I am loving it but am having to be the leopard big time when it comes to systems, tech, templates, forms etc. I've very quickly realised that coasting at home institutionalised me to such an extent that I now have massive social anxiety, imposter syndrome and paranoia that I am going to break everything. I am convinced that I am fucking up all the time and that everyone thinks I am a twat when actually nothing could be further from the truth - I know what I am doing, they are glad that I am there and are pleased with what I'm going to bring. I've also realised that people are friendly, nice, kind, want to chat and are good to be around. And that young people are amazing, my kids really are going to be OK in five years time. It's taken sleepless nights and lots of self-talk to get me through the door even here but I can see a change in the way I carry myself after 4 days.
Thanks Esther, needed this today. Like others here my work life feels wobbly. I've just left a huge organisation (well known and trusted but actually a serious shitshow of chaos underneath the cuddly exterior) where I had lots of holiday and flexibility but NO job satisfaction and no particular prospects, to join a very small organisation where the expectations are huge, far less holiday and flexibility (I'll need to work bank hols or take them out of my allowance for example) but the long term prospects could be enormous and the job satisfaction more immediate and palpable too. Thank for reminding me to pull on my big girl/leopard pants and take each day separately while I get used to things.
For the first time ever I’ve just taken a job with the same BH contract arrangements. Despite all the other benefits, it’s all I can think about currently 😂 Good luck.
Good luck to you too, it’s taking over my thoughts as well, with every Times article, blog or email I get about “taking advantage of the bank holiday weekend!” I revert to grumpy teenager, or grumpy perimeno bag. Will be thinking of you on Monday ☺️
Thank you. And you! I’ve opted for the ‘leave’ card but it’s biting hard. Least it’s warm and sunny in Devon, FINALLY!
Good for you!! I am one of life’s coasters, a grazing goat, and now use my children as an excuse for it. I’ve coasted my way into a lovely position to be fair. But it won’t move myself, my family or society (ha!! In commercial property - sure) on. The world frankly needs more people like you than me, and I am always in awe of the bravery, energy and tenacity it requires.
I have historically been a people pleaser, hating confrontation and going round in circles of resentment, putting myself out until I am exhausted just to meet other peoples’ needs.
I now have a new fantastic therapist, who is not a leopard but a lioness. She is teaching me new ways to create boundaries. I’m saying no and repeating myself until the message sinks in to the Level 10 cheeky f*ckers so they can no longer take advantage of my kindness. Go me!
Wise.
I am I new job, managing for the first time, in a very difficult operating environment. I am repeating the serenity prayer to my team at weekly team meetings (and also to myself when they piss me off… regularly)
The yips are the worst! Sam is probably too young but do you remember a novel called The Art of Fielding from about a decade ago? It’s a great novel in general but also terrific on the yips
this is great advice
Sage indeed, and funny. Thank you x
This piece made so much more sense once I realised I had misread the title and it was not about what we can learn from leotards.
To hold in your stomach and sparkle like a jewel?
Ignore the stomach and shine regardless?
My son eats barely anything. He says he doesn’t trust food. I get it and have decided to go with it and not stress too much.
Last month he said he remembered having a tuna sandwich or maybe a wrap that he had enjoyed. Since then he and I have tried together to re-create the sandwich or wrap, that he will enjoy. I think we are on our 11th attempt. Not too much mayo, plenty of mayo, black pepper, brown wrap, white sliced bread etc etc GOD we have tried.
That kid has tried each and everyone, and every bit of his face has wanted to enjoy it, but then it’s not right. Last night I had a brain wave and said was it at X’s party that you had it? yes he said!
Just messaged the mum and now ordering a Morrisons party platter of kids sandwiches. This could be the time my leopard finally gets out 😃
I do know this is ridiculous but I only have one child and that’s my excuse for everything.
He's winding you up. Stop pampering him.
Hope you get over that fence! My son is neurodiverse and eats a v restricted diet, but step by step, as he has gotten a bit older and his appetite has increased, he has got a little bit more adventurous with food! I always try not to look “too leopard” as I hang around him hoping against hope that he’ll eat something new! Good luck. Xxx
you are so leopard
Zinc drops in everything he eats! Often low zinc makes everything taste weird/bad.
Oh goodness really? I might try that
https://naturedoc.shop/product/metabolics-super-zinc-liquid/
try everything. test that fence
Thanks for this. I’m feeling a bit wobbly about work at the minute; usually a job I love but new boss is making life uncomfortable for everyone. I’m going to try to be more leopard. Xx
Kate I hear you. I’ve just gone through a traumatic time with work - almost was sick with fear one day. I need to be more leopard. 🐆